We teenagers are just misunderstood. Is it really too much to ask for to be loved and appreciated?
Not everyone knows what teenagers are going through and what their feelings are. Of course adults went through what we are going through, but that was a long time ago and they may have forgotten how they behaved and acted in their teenage years. By judging us, adults are saying they were never moody during their years, although they may have not started riots and vandalised. For these reasons I feel it is unfair for adults to judge us in a negative way.
Not all teenagers are lazy slobs. Most teenagers go out with their friends and do a range of activities. Many of us enjoy participating in sports, football being the main one. With teenagers hanging out with friends there is no way we can be labelled as lazy slobs.
Lazy, disobedient and anti-social are just some of the long list of infuriating stereotypes that wrongly describe teenagers. I’m not sure what it is that makes the rest of society despise ALL of us, not just the small few that ruin it for the rest of us.
Nothing makes me angrier than when I see how the media portrays teens in this way. Do YOU the public know why we teens sleep so often? We teenagers are constantly given such high expectations and are always being pressured to be the best that we can be. Skipping sleep may be harmful to you, particularly if you are driving, you are prone to be involved in a car accident. Teenagers are really the ones who need more sleep out of adutls and people younger than us. After having school, homework, tests, personal problems and things we do in our own time, you can not blame us for wanting to sleep for most of the time.
Us teenagers are going to be world leaders, Presidents and Prime Ministers, we need all the sleep we can get to reach the highest of our potential. You can look bad and feel moody.
I’m sure we would all appreciate it if school had started an hour later than usual. Our sleep patterns are also dictated by the light and our hormones. This hormone that is released is melatonin. Eight to ten hours of sleep will make us operate at our best.
Not all of us teens are bad, some maybe are, but that doesnt mean that through the whole of our teenage life we should be discriminated against because of our age. There are many teenagers that are 19 or on the verge 20 that are very successful and who can be an inspiration people older or younger.
Tom Wagg, a 15 year old boy who was doing his work experience at Keele University made an amazing discovery when he had least expected it. He found the planet 1,000 lightyears away. He is thought to be the youngest person to discover a planet. He was studying data of stars in the Milky Way when he discovered it. This shows teenagers can do amazing things. If a group of teens do a bad thing, all teens are criticized, whereas if a group of teens do a good thing, only this small group are praised.
Why we should praise teenagers:
1. Teenagers are more likely to do voluntary work. In fact, they are ten times more likely to be volunteering in their community than regularly be anti-social in them.
2. More teenagers than ever are staying at school after the age of 16 to study and further their education.
3. Despite the blame of most of crime being blamed on us teenagers, its is the teenagers that are mainly the victims of crime.
In conclusion, I believe that the good in most of teenagers is overlooked by a small minority of teenaers that actually are bad. I believe that we teenagers that are good, young and decent people, should not be associated with the teenagers that are bad. It is extremely unfair that adults can judge us although they behaved the same as us at one point.
April 12, 2015 at 12:16 pm
Hello Joseph
You have made a good start on you Expository Essay. I think your opening paragraph is strongest. You have outlined your argument and made it very clear that you are on the side of teenagers by using the pronouns “us” and “we”. You have also used a rhetorical questions.
To enhance your essay and achieve the expository essay badge you should:
1. Write at least 700 words, currently you are on 572, if you wrote another paragraph and a closing paragraph this should help you achieve the desired word count.
2. Be careful with your SPAG. For example, in your opening paragraph I think it would make more grammatical sense to write “We teenagers are just misunderstood people.” instead of “Us teenagers…”
3. Make sure your paragraphs all have a clear point and include features of persuasive writing- Can you re-work the final paragraph above so that it includes persuasive writing techniques?
I will give you time tomorrow in class to work on this.
Ms Andrews
April 12, 2015 at 11:07 pm
Hello Joseph,
I agree with Ms Andrews – you have made some good points, but you must be careful with your spelling and paragraph length.
You still have at least 50 words to go and you’re not finished yet!
April 15, 2015 at 10:03 pm
Joseph,
I can see that you’ve edited this since your last bit of feedback – I have two more targets for you:
1) Aim to re-draft at least one paragraph in order to achieve the Perfect Paragraph badge
http://achieve.community.edutronic.net/stage-one-writing/perfect-paragraph/
How will you meet this criteria?
2) Be strict with paragraph length.
If you have one final edit of sentence structure and tense – you should achieve the Expository Writing badge – not far to go!
May 19, 2015 at 6:19 pm
Joseph,
Not far to go now, but the following targets are stopping you from achieving the badge.
Targets:
How might you make your opening more engaging? I think you need a more effective word than ‘misread’ – Have you considered using a rhetorical question?
Re-read and edit your second paragraph – you have used the word ‘they’ eight times here. You will need to re-wrote this paragraph to avoid the repetition.
Your fourth paragraph is extremely long – where would you cut this? Why?
June 2, 2015 at 10:52 pm
Hello Joseph,
Please remember to use question marks when posing a rhetorical question.
Learn the difference between too and to.
June 18, 2015 at 2:32 pm
Please check that pressurised is the word that you want to use. I think you might mean pressured. Use a dictionary to check which one to use.
Please be sure you have used apostrophies when combining I and am.
July 8, 2015 at 4:04 pm
Information in paragraph four has come from: http://sleepfoundation.org/sleep-topics/teens-and-sleep
This is plagiarism. See me.